It’s a tough time to need a funeral or to want to get married.
But local celebrants say that despite COVID-19 restrictions it’s still possible to mark these important life ceremonies – particularly using technology.
Under Victoria’s COVID-19 restrictions, weddings are now limited to just five people including the religious minister, priest or celebrant presiding, the couple and two witnesses, while funerals are limited to just 10 attendees.
But registered Castlemaine celebrant Randall Berger said digital technology meant significant and legally binding life ceremonies could be made the most of and shared with more, rather than fewer, guests all over the world.
“One of the benefits of the new normal for weddings and funerals is the limited numbers and spectacle has reined in the costs involved,” he said.
“The ceremonies can focus on the people being honoured and celebrated.
“With a laptop and a video camera, you can Zoom a wedding or a funeral all over the world for free. In fact, some wedding chapels and funeral homes are offering this service.”
In April during the first lockdown, Mr Berger officiated at a special wedding convened quickly for a terminally ill woman and her significant other.
“It was a lot of fun even though it was sad and she was very frail, a very beautiful moment,” the local celebrant said.
“She’d been given just days to live but after the ceremony she went on to have another five weeks. Maybe it was all the positive energy.”
Mr Berger believes that “in the age of COVID people need to think outside the box” and regards significant cost saving as just one of the positives particularly for typically expensive weddings.
“Some people are just not aware that they can get married or have a funeral with all the guests they would have had – but do it using Zoom or Skype or the like,” he said.
“I recently went to a funeral for a close friend and it was streamed all over the world.”
“If anything, the lockdown has released us from traditions.
“Weddings can be intimate, but you can invite hundreds to your streaming. Parents will be happy because venue, catering, limos, travel and other costly trimmings aren’t necessary.”
Blackwood-based registered celebrant and experienced celebrant trainer Genevieve Messenger said one of the toughest things for mourners attending funerals was not just the limit on attendee numbers, but also the inability to give and receive consoling physical contact.
“My heart aches for families who can’t hug,” said Ms Messenger who performed two funerals in recent weeks including one that occurred between the first lockdown and current Stage 3 – meaning 50 people could attend.
“The hard thing is not hugging,” she said.
Harcourt celebrant Vicki Polglase, a member of The Celebrants Society for registered celebrants practicing in New Zealand and Australia, agreed with this observation.
“One of the biggest challenges for people attending funerals is not making contact because they must remain 1.5 metres apart. These are people in grief,” Ms Polglase said.
But the celebrants all agree that using teleconferencing technology like Zoom can be a significant help, enabling family and friends who can’t otherwise attend to connect and contribute.
“Funerals can become a heartfelt memorial by the family that can be shared with family and friends wherever they are,” Mr Berger said.
For couples content to have a very intimate wedding ceremony with just the permitted two witnesses and celebrant present, Ms Polglase noted that while the celebrant must wear a mask – and so must the couple before the actual official ceremony – the couple need not be masked while actually being married.
“This is an extraordinary world at the moment. Very challenging times,” she said. “But if couples are thinking of being married they should feel free to give a celebrant a ring and just have a chat to see what might be possible, even if it’s just to start planning.”
