Capturing the weird, wacky and wonderful spirit of Castlemaine and all its inhabitants, Castlemaine The Musical is full of laugh-out-loud moments, in-jokes and talent.
A two-hour performance that had audiences laughing from beginning to end, as a young couple navigate the intricacies of becoming a local in a town full of hippies, footballers and hot rodders.
The first big number, ‘There aren’t no R in Castlemaine’, written by talented local writer Cate Kennedy, gives the audience an appreciation for the hilarity that is to follow.
“Let’s get one thing clear – it’s a creative mecca here,” narrator Jen Moore sings, joined by the talented local chorus and back-up dancers.
“It’s hotrods and passive homes and artisanal beer, but there’s no r, there’s no r-r-r-r, there is no ‘r’ in ‘Castlemaine’.
“And the person who brings your coffee will have a PhD, I bet. We’ve got eighteen yoga classes and a naturopathic vet. And it never rains, except when it pours, in a hundred-year flood. Just like your name, an R in Castlemaine, will turn to mud,” they sing.
“We’ve got tai chi and ukuleles, and water purifiers, soy and oat and almond milk, and at least a dozen choirs, but we won’t have a bar of you putting an ‘r’ in ‘Castlemaine’”
Weaving through important social issues that impact the town, co-writers Suzanne Donisthorpe and Cate Kennedy highlight the dire housing situation as the protagonists, Melissa (Breiga Young and Jake (Charlie Lloyd), struggle to find an affordable rental and are reduced to sleeping in a tent, before buying an over-priced fixer-upper.
“150 Airbnbs, and not one place to rent. We’re in a queue of a hundred and two, and this is our lament,” they sing as they sleep in a tent under the stars.
“Nobody wants a massive mortgage. Just want to get stuff out of storage. Housing shortage, and we’re living in a tent, yes, it’s a housing shortage, and we’re living in a tent!”
Purchasing a rickety-old ‘renovator’s dream,’ the pair delve into the murky waters of the online chat group Castlemainia, where they quickly discover the dark underbelly of the town.
A colourful, expressive performance by local dance troupe the Castlemainiacs, who highlight the controversial supermarket and 50k wars that have played on the town’s collective consciousness of recent years. A basic request for help finding a plumber and a few basic items sees the newcomers come under fire from the well-known ‘keyboard warriors’.
The show happily skips across the proverbial line with songs about the ‘Castlemaine shuffle’ (a well- known town secret of partner swapping with a bit of polygamy on the side) and the ‘Skank Mum’ rap number that refers to a repeated graffiti tag-line on the bridge into town that reads, ‘My mum’s a skank’.
Their adopted dog, Kennedy, played by Luca Romani, cleverly provides comic relief throughout, alongside the back-up dancers and chorus.
The show sold out quickly, leaving many disappointed locals. Luckily, the team had the foresight to record the production, which will soon be screened at the Phee Broadway Theatre, so keep an eye out for more details.
